PS, Law School

Actually, in particular, my legal writing professor. I need to get a paid job at a big firm this summer? Really? Wow! Okay, just let me go get on that! Thanks for letting me know that if I don't I'm watching my legal career swirl down the drain!

Also, thanks for the great advice on how to be morally bankrupt! So if, this summer, one of my fellow interns asks for help on a situation or document, I should politely tell them I'll get back to them soon and then never respond? That seems like a great way to foster interoffice relationships...what did I do before you entered my life? I revere your wisdom.

Glad I came to class today!

Cordially,
Erica

(Above advice is unembellished and from a real law class.)

Dear Law School

Dear Law School,

I am not a cock-eyed optimist by any means. In fact, my glass is usually half-empty and I like it that way. But little by little you are wearing me down. Like when you give away scholarships for those working in public interest positions, and they inexplicably go to people who don’t have jobs lined up; who drive Mercedes; who have never volunteered anything but their opinion; who didn’t even meet all the criteria listed on the form.

And then there are my friends, people who used to be social workers, who have volunteered at inner city summer camps and clinics and who knows what else, who actually want to make a difference. Who know that being poor isn’t something to be ashamed of, and there are a lot of honest people who need help. Who could actually use the money to pay their expenses, because they don’t live in a fancy condo in the good side of town, financed by their parents.

You make me sad. Part of the reason I hate you, law school, is because it’s not about how smart you are, or how you work. It’s about who you know on what committee, or who your dad has lunch with.

So I sit, and listen to you talk about the limo you are renting for law prom, and make fun of people who live in trailers and that guy with the moobs, and decide not to go to class tomorrow.

Love,
Erica

Seventh Day, Seven Things

Seven Things About Me

1. I am a horrible dancer. Self-conscious, no rhythm, stomps on toes. However, once I had a “Mongolian mother” and who knows what was in there, because suddenly I became the Best Dancer Ever. No rhythm, stomps on toes, totally confident. Pour me another!

2. Some inexplicable things make me cry. That Diet Dr Pepper commercial, where the little six pack sneaks out from the soda aisle and marches to the candy aisle and then the candy sticks get ecstatic and start dancing and the cupcakes snuggle their new high-fructose corn syrup friends while the theme from “Cheers” plays? Makes me snuffle. That candy is just so happy to see those Dr Peppers.

3. I always go to see independent films and arthouse darlings, but my favorite movie in the world is Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan. I LOVE that movie. Nothing has ever made me laugh that hard.

4. I shop to make myself feel better, but I almost always return all of it. Stores hate me.

5. I really like street performers. I could watch them forever, especially if they’re playing odd instruments. I mainly draw this from my experience in Spain, where I was forever stopping to watch frog puppets and street bands.

6. I only have three very close friends, but I love them passionately and have for years (one since I was 11!). There doesn’t seem to be room for many other people (especially with the hectic pace of lawschool…)

7. I’m currently two different people—at school I’m quiet and standoffish and survival-of-the-fittest, but anywhere else I generally feel outgoing and friendly and ready to mingle.

Anyone else consider yourself tagged!! Thanks, Rachael, for tagging me.

(Also, I responded to all your comments on the last post but thanks again for your support! I had actually broken up with my boyfriend the same day I posted that blog, and your kind words really helped!)

Since I currently can’t post pics of myself, here are my current fashion faves:

These Gap undies are amazing…you can wash them a million times and they still look great, and the stretch lace makes them super-comfy…no mini-muffin bulge under dresses or skirts!

Fashion starts from the skin out…this scent is AMAZING and perks you up in the morning.

Wearing this shirt out...looks great with dark-wash wide legs and red peep toes!

Back from the Beyond

First of all, sorry it took me so long to get back and give you an update! I spent the week after I got robbed moving, and then I was so behind in my law work that I have been swamped ever since. The robberies in the complex are still going on, which is crazy to me—I guess the management there just doesn’t care about its tenants. They actually told me they knew it was someone in the complex, but obviously they aren’t going to do anything about it. I hope the manager enjoyed her cut from my new TV.

However, my new apartment is amazing--it's 200 square feet bigger, with a massive garden tub, gas fireplace, hardwoods, and an alarm. Even better, the closet is so big I can finally hang up every item of clothing I own--at one time. There are security guards in the parking lot every night, and cameras in the halls. I feel so much safer. And the best thing is that it was only $50 more a month. Thank you, horrible economy! I've had to cut out some fun activities like eating out, but it's worth it to feel secure in my lovely new place. They even painted a wall yellow for me, so it's sunny and cheery.

A lot has happened since I moved, as well. “Happened” as in I took a hammer and made a shambles of everything. I went to law school because I was so lost with what I wanted in my life. I didn’t know what path to take, if I wanted to get married and have a family, if I wanted to focus on a career instead, if I wanted to join the Peace Corp and move to the Ukraine.

In retrospect, the law has been a mistake for me. I don’t enjoy the competition or the work, despite the fact that I did so well. I don’t really indentify with or enjoy many of my peers, and I think I might have been better suited to a Ph.D. program with one of my true passions, English or History. I’m still looking into it. I’m not a quitter, and I will finish law school. But if I don’t like practice, I’m not going to tie myself to it.

I also broke up with my boyfriend of five years. Maybe that will be a mistake, but it feels right for so many reasons, even while I’m crushed and crying. We both just want drastically different things out of life, and even I’ve broken both our hearts I feel like my decision was the necessary one. I’m just not ready for a wedding—I’ve really never wanted that like some people do. I didn’t plan it as a little girl, don’t browse “The Knot” in my spare time, and just get no joy out of the thought of picking out the dress and the garter and tasting frostings to make my perfect day. I’m not ready for the marriage that comes after, either. I like to live alone and run my own life, not answering to anyone.

However, this does not mean I’m horribly sad! I have a buoyant hope that soon things will work out—I’ll find my niche in the law or something else, meet a love that takes my breath (and selfishness) away, and have a lovely charmed life. It just means that this blog might turn into an “Erica figures out her life” blog, and you are not obligated to read it at all. I can’t afford a new camera, so while I still strive for fashion I just can’t share it.

Thank you for all your kind comments after I was robbed! They really meant a lot to me, and I hope all has been going well in your lives. It feels good to be back.